46 : Lindsay Gone Wilde

A film based on Oscar Wilde’s play about English upper class society, ‘A Woman of No Importance’ is due to be released in 2009- ushering in for public consumption a taste of Wilde’s wit and particular brand of dark comedy. The world is ready for entertainment this acerbic- as evidenced by the success of Seth Rogens dry-tongued character Zack in the 2008 hit ‘Zack and Miri Make a Porno’- but does anyone really care about a bunch of wealthy Victorian airheads? Maybe… if Lindsay Lohan is one of them. Since being signed on in 2006, rumours have swirled that she’s been pulled from the project and replaced by the uuber talented Amanda Seyfried, who held her own alongside Meryl Streep in 2008’s breathtakingly talent-filled film ‘Mamma Mia’. Personally though, if I had to watch a bunch of useless, flaky, ignorant bimbos fumbling their way through two hours of my time, I’d rather it be in the poignant, striking, husky-voiced manner of Ms. Lohan than any other.

47 : Angry Ashton

It’s absolutely hilarious how big a saga publicity-loving Ashton Kutcher has turned his neighbors home construction into. With building work next door starting at 7:30am, disapproving Kutcher has publicly blogged his incredible verbal diatribe, calling the neighbor a series of insults including: "owl feces cougar placenta”. Ashton’s own cougar, Demi Moore, has posted responses about the incidents on her own blog, and the offending neighbor has responded by saying: “they don’t make hammers out of rubber.” The irony of course is that Ashton’s own house was built over a ten year period. Lets hope these two come up with more reality hilarity over the next few months. God knows the world needs a laugh this year, and Ashton is just the man to deliver.

48 : Changing Chanel

Who would have thought that Chanel would have become the brand that is has mutated into? Surely not Gabrielle Bonheur ‘Coco’ Chanel herself, the poorhouse born girl who learned to seamstress during her years in the orphanage and worked her way up to build an empire that has influenced haute couture so strongly that she was the only person in the field to be named in TIME Magazine's 100 most influential people of the 20th century. Now, with Chanel MobileArt touring the world touting fashion as art, and a new film, ‘Coco Before Chanel’ starring Audrey Tatou, being released later this year, it seems that every aspect of Coco Chanel’s professional- and now personal- life is being sliced up and dished out to the public. For a woman whose design ethic states: "simplicity is the keynote of all true elegance" it seems that her legacy has become awfully overcomplicated.

49 : Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea

Did anyone else love Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea? I did, but it wasn’t because of the storyline or the creepy water-blob monsters (which were quite awesome- who does the vocal effects for those things?) Ponyo was another chapter in the legacy of Hayao Miyazaki- his ninth film for Japanese anime studo, Studio Ghibli- and I must admit that it was far weaker than any of his films I’ve seen. This tale was supposed to be an adaptation of The Little Mermaid, but hung around the storyline loosely and never quite managed to fit into expectations. Compared to Miyazaki’s previous contribution, Howl’s Moving Castle, which became one of the most financially successful Japanese films in history, Ponyo was a relaxed writing effort that left me feeling two decades too old to be in the theatre. I truly hope that this was merely a slip, and that the already-retired legend Miyazaki isn’t losing his touch.

50 : Danity Diddy

Once there were five, now there are three… apparently P.Diddy’s modelicious group Danity Kane has had a member chopped after she got her lovely upper bits out for a magazine cover. The ‘image’ that she was moving towards wasn’t in line with the band’s, apparently. Which is weird since they all lay around semi-naked on the CD covers. Perhaps Diddy is chagrined about a member actually making a name for herself independently, or doing what she likes with her own body. I mean, what’s the point of owning a band of hot robot-girls if you can’t control them completely, right?

51 : Location location location!

We’ve all heard of the mile high club. There are hotel getaways and other sexy locations to get your groove on; cars, bathrooms, parks… there’s all sorts of naughty niches to have a quick hanky panky. What I want to know is where the not-so-normal naughty spots are. I mean have you ever had sex on a golf course? Or sex in the tool shed? What about at the public library? Where is the weirdest place you can think of to have sex?

52 : Angry Madonna

Madonna’s epic divorce with Guy Ritchie could leave the ‘Lock Stock’ director with more than $150 million but he’s said that he doesn’t want a cent of her money. Madonna launched divorce proceedings that portrayed him as a cruel and selfish husband, and dedicated the song ‘Miles Away’ onstage to “Anyone who knows someone who is emotionally retarded- God knows I do!” So Mister Madonna is understandably annoyed. He’s got his own money, but still, $150 million is a tidy sum. Would you take it, or stand on principle and refuse?

53 : Billy Bob Homewrecker?

Did mouldy old Billy Bob Thornton steal David Duchovny’s wife of eleven years, Tea Leoni? She and Mouldy Bob worked on a film together called Manure and the next thing you know, she’s split from Mulder (Duchovny) and creeping around with Billy Bob, who actually looks like he could have been cast as an X in the X-files movie.
What do you think? Is Tea Leoni walking on the wild side? Did she ditch X-hunter for X-creature?

54 : Troublesome Threesome

This is a questions for the gals out there. So you and your partner have decided to have a threesome. What sex is the other party? Of course the guys want another hot girl, but what do you want? Would you prefer to be waited upon by two men, or explore with another girl? And if you do choose a girl, does that automatically make you bisexual?

55 : Gay sex is better

The world’s homosexual population is increasing steadily. With the global population also increasing by the moment, multitudes of the more intelligent of our species appear to be balancing out the offspring deluge by turning to same-sex partners for satisfaction. Perhaps this is caused by some higher-level consciousness combined with foresight and knowledge that there are more unguided children than responsible parents to look after them. Perhaps same-sex partners are more understanding and open to communication. Or maybe it really is because gay sex is better. What do you think?

56 : Sex vs. Money

With the economy impaired and spending power diminished, lets turn our attention to topics less costly and more applicable to all. Sex vs. money!
We all want money and we all want sex. We envy others who have more money and we envy those who have more sex. It’s often thought that money equals sex, but if you have no money and are having copious amounts of sex, are you more enviable than someone who has money but no sex? Or does money itself automatically equal sex? And which would you rather have, sex or money?

57 : Is Mac the new LV?

If Louis Vuitton is high end mass market brand genius, then Mac could be considered the David to beware for LV’s Goliath.
Mac’s branding is infallible, engaging and captivating in its area, as is LV’s.
Mac has released a travel computer in the form of the Macbook Air and LV is a travel brand who have just released new global audio guides for their tenth anniversary of their City Guide (www.LouisVuittonSoundwalk.com). Both Mac and LV are renowned in their fields. So, is it a match of the titans or a match made in heaven? Will Mac become the next must-have accessory, and have LV fighting for the consumers dollar? I mean, really, if you had to have the new iPhone or an LV wallet, which would you choose?

58 : Queueing for Q

Who doesn’t adore or admire Maggie Q? She’s become the pride of Asia, one whom we consider our own despite her Hawaiian birthright. Her determination has shone through as we’ve proudly watched her climb from Asian TV screens to movie cameos and finally to the big leagues, kicking ass with Tom Cruise in "Mission: Impossible III", Bruce Willis in "Live Free or Die Hard, and now adopting more fleshy character roles with Ewan McGregor and Hugh Jackman. Next is a film with Ethan Hawke. It seems that Maggie Q has finally arrived where we all secretly (or not so secretly) hoped she would, and if she keeps up her elegant ascent she’ll be the international animal rights ambassador equivalent of Jolie in no time. Thankfully, she has stayed true to her Asian heritage and might just be the woman to break the back of the Asian stereotype mould in Hollywood. It’s a lofty goal- dare we think it? As she’s proved to her unfaltering fans time and time again, if Ms. Q is involved, anything is possible.

59 : Hollywood, wake up!

I don’t know that Eurasian babes get enough international credit. Super talents like action-adept actress Maggie Q, tri-lingual screen starlet Ankie Beilke, uuber host/VJ Denise Keller and stage/screen/CD chanteuse Karen Mok are big names here in Asia, but will they be taken seriously in Hollywood? A better question is this: when will Hollywood realize that tapping into Eurasian talent is the next big step in entertainment? These beauties and their kin have a global appeal; they’re interesting, intelligent, ambitious, hardworking and ambiguously beautiful. They have all of Asia watching their every move, which is no small thing to ignore for international advertisers, and they are already experienced and comfortable with multi-continental fame. So what next? We wait. We hope. We shout out against typecasting, support our starlets, and eagerly anticipate the day that the mass-market epiphany occurs.
Who would you want to see on the red carpet?

60 : Edison Forever?

Someone mentioned to me the other day that the Edison scandal was just a brilliant ploy to boost him into the international spotlight. Although ruthless, heartless and totally self-serving, I must admit that if this is the case, the guy has more blind ambition than any celeb I’ve ever known! But it made me think… could anyone be so soulless to destroy that many others in the pursuit of their own goals? The guy is obviously a bit of an ego-fetishist to have taken over a thousand photos of different girls, but I find it hard to believe how anyone with a super-ego could submit themselves to extremes of public humiliation on purpose. Then again, the risks would be huge but the gains could be plenty. Already he’s become an international name, landed roles in Hollywood films, and risen to the global status of infamous, a la Paris Hilton. What next? An Edison movie? An apology album? Edison on the cover of American GQ? Edison-Branson Schools of Ruthlessness? Whatever happens it seems that this global boost will keep the dirty-handed lad around for a very long time.

61 : Sellout in the City

The Sex and the City movie was shockingly and severely disappointing. Not only was it a jaw-droppingly materialistic, 2.5 hour advertisement for highly priced fashionable trash, but the insultingly blatant product placement actually got in the way of the story.
The loveable characters were all there with a few fabulous extras like Jennifer Hudson (DreamGirls) but the pitiable brand obsession buzzed in your face incessantly like a pesky bug that won’t take a hint, and dragged everyone down into the gullible realm of sad, shallow and sloppy.
It looked like the same stylist who had wooed us with her brilliant flair throughout the TV show, Patricia Field, had suffered from some complete collapse of judgement, so the only thread left to keep us from walking out was the amazing friendship the woman shared. This the creators obviously knew, because they rounded up the show with even more product placement, but this time, the product was friendship. So, if you want a movie with amazing fashion and a feel-good after-buzz, watch The Devil Wears Prada. If you want reassurance that it’s okay to be a simple self obsessed, brand-hoarding narcissist, then Sex and the City is definitely the movie for you.

62 : Money matters

Somewhere, at some point, it was decided that people were generally stupid and lazy and had to be treated like donkeys. So, in order to get them to work, a carrot was dangled in front of people’s noses and they were rewarded according to the amount of work that they did. Some people figured out that if they could do things that other people could not do, they could get more carrots. And so society evolved to the point that we’re at now, where most of us still work for carrots despite the fact that we hate the work that we’re doing. Freud said..."No other technique for the conduct of life attaches the individual so firmly to reality as laying emphasis on work; for his work at least gives him a secure place in a portion of reality, in the human community. "
It does tempt the question that each of us needs ask ourselves: are we merely donkeys chasing carrots, or do we run free busying ourselves with activities that are worth the passing hours of our life? Is money really all that matters?

63 : Silent Noise

Our lives are more and more detached from others. We work all day and usually spend our evenings in front of a screen, fondling our minds with some irrelevant updates on TV or Facebook. We barely go out except for the occasional drunken nights of non-conversation milling in a crowd of leering strangers, which results in our main communication being faceless conversations that have a backspace button. With sites like Twitter.com we can piece our entire lives together in cyberspace, creating badly sewn Franken-clones of the lives we want others to see that we have.
Humans are inherently social creatures. If all other humans are communicating via technology, does that make it our new social medium? And if so, then despite the hours spent ‘socialising’ via SMS or msn or email, why are so many of us still so lonely?

64: TopTipsForGirls

I know this is a bit of a detraction from what I normally write about but I seriously have to let you know about this website for women- it’s amazing. Called TopTipsForGirls.com, it is a compilation of handy tips and tricks covering all areas of female life, from how to be cool in a crowd to how to deal with a screaming toddler. Real women submit their experiences and advice and it’s a little community for those of us who don’t have a handbook passed down by our grandparents, or are living solo and missing out on valuably handy tips like using shaving cream to get stains out of the carpet or using a potato to plump up and hydrate the skin on your face. Many of us women are battling in the workplace alongside men and doing our best to be considered their equals. But we mustn’t forget that despite being able to multi-task, run a corporation, raise kids and keep a beautiful home… just being women is what we do best; creating a family, creating a community, creating a global platform on which to share our information. Join us ladies! Share your lives!

65 : God.com

From the creators of the high quality site TheCoolHunter.net comes a shocking new site called Dear-God.net
The site raises the question of whether humans just need an anonymous listener to share their load with in order to cope with life. In a modern society so detached and alone in its crowded madness, we all seem to have lost touch with not only each other but ourselves as well.
In using cyberspace as our medium for relief, do we acknowledge only a comfort taken in the unknown, or does it simply highlight that we’re really just looking for friends under guises? I wonder how much of this concept is a support system and how much is a collective cry for help in the insanity of today’s society. If we spent less time in front of our computers and more with our peers, would there be any need for a website such as this?

66 : Secret Selves…

Most women have a secret wardrobe. The power suit executive may have frilly low cut D&G leopard prints in her secret stash, the smart-casual secretary a load of sexy power heels. People who dress comfortably for their hectic day might have a wardrobe of ‘nice’ (or uncomfortable) shoes or outfits that they save ‘for a special occasion’ but never work up the courage to wear. What about that item that you’ve never worn, but ‘one day’ you will, you’re sure of it. This duality seems to highlight most of our lives; the person that we would like to be versus the person that we have to be. And what of that idealized person? What are their merits, so strong as to live on in our minds and pervade our reality? Are they really the people that we want to be, or the people that we know we never will be but nurture anyways as a harmless escapism from our faced realities.
Perhaps we would do better to look at the evidence and address what it is we’re denying about ourselves. Often acknowledging these little issues will create an amazing amount of emotional freedom. And more wardrobe space.

67 : Accidentally cheating on your partner

I’ve heard the phrase ‘accidentally cheat on your partner’ and find it absolutely baffling. Are there really people out there so daft as to think this excuse will work on anyone but the most intellectually devoid of fools? So lets get this straight, you got drunk and kissed/ had sex with some random person whose name you can’t remember. Oh, wait, that’s right, because you had three beers you were bodily possessed by some malignant spirit who brainwashed you and forced you to act against your will. I’m sorry, but YES that does make you an idiot, not for telling your partner but for being stupid enough to use alcohol as an excuse for the fact that you want to be single but can’t stand being alone. Deal with your issues instead of running from them and for Sam’s sake (or whatever their name was) don’t commit to anything until you’re actually ready for it.

68 : Who’s your daddy?

Forgotten who your child’s father is? Not sure if that funny looking kid is yours? Fret no more! Identigene DNA collection kits are now being sold at drugstores in the USA. You can pick them up right near the home pregnancy tests. Now, I understand the idea behind the concept, but the fact that the time and money has been invested to actually create the product must mean there’s a good deal of people out there who would need it. This in itself is alarming on multi-tiered branches of morals, but on the upside it might actually encourage steadfast sexual monogamy, since babies can now claim ownership with a simple cotton swap swipe. So, keep your fannies in the pants of your partner ladies, because now there really is no copping out of infidelity.

69 : Game of Fools

Is the bestselling book, The Game, really just a losers guide to getting laid, or is it less cretinous than initial impressions lead you to believe? The book arouses your curiosity as the story follows a ‘geek’ into a remarkable world of insecure boys who spend years trying to find their confidence and manhood through the pickup of depthless women in nightclubs. These guys have no confidence, no charm and really nothing going for them at all, so they have to fake it and that is their game.
The book has been a global bestseller, highlighting how many tepid and clueless men there really are out there. But behind the psychologically juvenile methods and strange sad stories recounted, there is some pretty amazing writing. Neil Strauss guides you through the full bodied recollection of a traveled vein with the hand of a master, deft and confident. Though some people revere this book as the ‘bible of picking up club sluts’, I argue that the real mastery in this book lays in the art of penmanship, not physical prowess.

70 : MuffinTops

So, they have a fat girl in the Miss England competition. I know that calling her a ‘fat girl’ makes me sound anti-curves but that’s just too bad. It’s what she is, with a BMI six points over her 5’10” optimal at the young age of 17.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s fine to be full figured and curvaceous; we totally adore fatties Crystal Renn, Nigella Lawson and Sophie Dahl- I’m a happy size 12 myself, but I am quite aware that society seems to be embracing fatness with arms a little too widely open. It’s worrying that people are accepting being a bigger size when they are NOT NATURALLY THAT SIZE… if you eat more vegetables than anything else, eat only as much as you need and get out of breath exercising three times a week and you are still a size twelve then congratulations, that’s your natural size. If you are sitting on your lazy ass, placing your job before your health and eating deep fried food all over the place, then you’re just a disgusting lazy fat ass who doesn’t deserve the right to complain about your size. We need to remember that while no size is ‘bad’ or ‘good’,it is wrong to lie to ourselves about our true size and it is right to treat our bodies as they deserve to be treated, no matter what size.

71 : Ugly in the City

In some ways, it must be hard for Sarah Jessica Parker. She shot to stardom as the super fashionable and loveable Carrie Bradshaw, lead chick of Sex and The City. Carrie was sweet, pensive and unerringly uuber stylish, thanks to the heavy-handed genius of costume designer Patricia Field. When time came to design her own fashion line for Steve & Barry’s stores, SJP proved to the world that her character was merely that: a character. From the unfortunate name, ‘Bitten’ to the taste-tragic collections, the line was a unanimous flop, disappointing and confusing millions of women and fans worldwide.
Now SJP has earned the title of “Unsexiest Actresses” and once again oscillated annoyingly; she admirably quips; “I never thought I was sexy, either” and then later has a pathetic whine about the judgement and how traumatic it was. You can only wonder when or if she’ll ever figure out that a two-faced public image is probably a large part of what earned her the title in the first place.

72 : Olsen Twins for Playboy?

Apparently Hugh Hefner has been chasing them to pose for the famous hag-mag since they turned eighteen, but can you really see the Olsen’s doing it? They’ve both been working since they were nine months old, and have been on the Forbes “Celebrity 100” list since 2002, reaching eleventh place with an estimated net worth of $100 million by 2007. These girls have some serious business savvy. Having said that, they’re still trying to break out of their ‘teen queen’ mould and get taken seriously in the entertainment business, something that peers Lindsay Lohan, Hillary Duff, Mischa Barton and the breathtaking Emma Watson are well on the way to attaining. Will a playboy shoot tip the balance and send them skyrocketing into that adult league? And would we love them less if they did it?

73 : Condolences for Corrine

Our favourite nightingale, Corinne Bailey Rae, lost her husband recently in what looks to be a shattering tragedy for the angelic starlet. Married since 2001, she’s frequently quoted how her husband inspires her songwriting and how lucky she is to have found someone who she wants to spend the rest of her life with. With a super clean-cut image that’s unusual for the industry, the news of her husband’s possible death from a drug overdoes must surely be salt on the wound. My heart goes out to her and her family- she who has done so well and stayed so strong in a shark-filled industry, only to suffer this incredible blow. Heath Ledger, Britney on the edge, and now this? It really does make me wonder- is the entertainment industry cursed? What price must be paid for fame?

74 : Marvellous Mads

So Madonna’s new single, titled ”4 Minutes to Save The World”, will debut in a new Sunsilk commercial that’s meant to inspire girls to play around with their current styles and, obviously, their hair colour. You’ve got to love this woman. She’s just pulled out the next Big Trend and guess what? It’s totally asian. Her styling and makeup looks as if she should be sheathed in a kimono and aside from her fair colouring you could almost see her as a harajuku girl or Asian Vogue model. It’s a smart move to open her markets, encourage globalization and further her status as the worlds most trendsetting superstar; a living legend and one heck of an amazing woman.

75 : Offensive Oklahoma

Apparently Republicans in the state of Oklahoma are applauding congresswoman Sally Kern for saying that gays are worse than terrorists.
She stated in a video posted on the internet that “The homosexual agenda is destroying this nation; it’s just a fact. I honestly think it’s the biggest threat our nation has, even more so than terrorism or Islam.”
In 2006 this biased bigot tried to pass a law that let parents decide if they wanted to allow their children access to homosexual or sexually explicit books in the library, which would be implemented by having all such books segregated obviously from the rest of the library. In the same year she tried to pass a law that allowed teachers to question and ‘teach a range of scientific views on the theory of evolution’. What ‘range’ are we talking about exactly?? Is it really up for debate whether we actually sprouted from plants instead of mammals? The most alarming thing about people like this is that they actually get into governments and make choices for the population. I can’t decide if it reminds me more of the movie Lions for Lambs, or Idiocracy.

76 : Celebrity Role Model

It’s great to see celebrities donating their time and money to worthy causes.
Reese Witherspoon (Legally Blonde, Walk The Line) has launched a global United Nations campaign to end violence against women and Drew Barrymore (E.T, Charlies Angels) has recently donated USD$1 million to the World Food Program to help feed children in Africa. Angelina Jolie reportedly gives 30% of her earnings to charity, which is just amazing. When we think about how much money these celebrities make, it seems due that they’d give something back, but many selfish messed up cases like Britney and Winehouse are too concerned with their own issues to give a crap about anyone else’s more dire circumstances. So, it doesn’t seem to matter how much money we have- we can choose to care about others or take the route of self obsession. The choice is entirely ours.
What we have to wonder is this: which of those celebrities are we more like?

77 : Fergiemisfit

I know that a lot of people look up to Fergie aka Fergilicious, but is she really any kind of role model at all? Yes, it’s admirable that she kept chasing her dream of stardom in the music industry and finally triumphed globally with the Black Eyed Peas. Yes, she tenaciously battled on after the failure of her pop-girly group Wild Orchids and fought through the consequent depression.. but she has proudly admitted that she still regularly undergoes drug therapy, and publicly gushes that hypnotherapy is the method that really works for her.
This seems more like a cry for love and attention than a statement of any worth. Admitting that you battle the urge to take drugs and then commending a method of treatment that’s obviously not squelched your habit is just daft.
If hypnotherapy really worked for her, she wouldn’t still be battling the urge. If she was really a role model to be looked up to, as opposed to just some poster child chanteuse, she should be smart enough to release a slightly more intelligent and less conflicting statement on her narcotic affair.

78 : School of failure

The problem I have with schools these days is they seem to be all about putting unicorns into stables. The kids that excel in only one area are usually reprimanded for not excelling in the rest, and forced to improve in the negative areas, often neglecting the positive as a result. This carries on through high school and often through to university, with more and more people unsure of what they want to study or do, because they have forgotten that childhood passion. Maybe in our parent’s generations, it was important to get a degree and have one steady job for our whole lives, but nowadays it’s about flexibility and creative thinking- the ability to adapt to many jobs and international situations over a lifetime- and I think that the antiquated school system needs to teach exactly that.

79 : What aren’t our parents telling us?

I wish my parents had warned me about credit cards; how they’re addictive, dangerous for debt and should be stayed away from at all costs. How the banks are never really on your side. I wish they’d taught me about stocks and bonds, investing and property buying; about makeup and fashion tragedies; proper eating and exercise. I wish my parents had taught me a lot of basic things about life that I’ve had to learn on my own, and have then passed down to my sisters. Why didn’t our parents do that? Write us a little book with some of their experiences and say “Here, just in case you need it?” A guidebook to life, if you will? And why, oh why, aren’t these guidebooks passed out in schools? They’re things we all need to know? So why isn’t anyone teaching them?

80 : Mixed nuts will rule the world

Is it just me, or does the hot top celebrity platter seem to be getting more and more ethnically mixed? Cameron Diaz is Cuban-American/ Anglo-German, Johnny Depp is Cherokee Indian/ Irish/ German, Rosario Dawson is Puerto Rican/ Afro-Cuban/ Irish/ Native American, Halle Berre is African American/ English, rising superstar Maggie Q is Vietnamese/ French/ Irish/ Polish and popular newcomer supermodel Chanel Iman is Korean/African-American. And that’s just to name a few. A lot of the hotties at the top seem to be mixed these days, whether in blood or nationality. This, in my eyes, along with the not-altogether-unexpected vanguard of Asians in Gucci and Chanel’s international campaigns seems a prophesy of things to come; we’ve reached the tipping point of globalization. From this point on, borders will blur more than ever, our screens and advertisements will be filled with ethnically ambiguous characters, and more than anything we’ll have highlighted the fact that the world really is smaller than it was ten years ago.

81 : Psycho Pet Lovers Unite

Psycho pet lovers unite…
Being invited to another pet birthday party has me wondering if I have a sign on my forehead that reads, “I am a sociologically challenged dog obsessed weirdie.”
Although my partner confirms that I do not have this tattooed on any part of me, I still get invited to these strange animal orgies, where the humans sit chatting about their dogs all evening, who are humping, fighting, or rolling in poop under the table. I find it so bizarre that these people think of themselves as ‘parents’ of these canines and have mad parties for them, but don’t train or discipline them in any way whatsoever; allowing their beloved creatures to become spoilt, fat, unfit and ruined.
How am I supposed to believe that these people would make anything but terrible parents of human babies?
Do you think how you raise your animal a direct correlation to how you’ll raise your children?

82 : Less Cheese, Please!

Less Cheese, Please!
February 17th, 2008 Posted in Raven Hanson

Raven Says: I only just watched the movie Enchanted, starring Amy Adams and Patrick Dempsey last week, and as cute as it was, I wondered about the female protagonist’s insistence that you can only show someone you love them with a song. Most people sound like honking frogs when they sing, so for the majority of us, it’s the gesture that’s sweeter than the actual song. That, or the fact that our men would openly make fools of themselves for us, which is exactly what they’re doing - so it’s more of a psychological power trip than anything.
Sure, there are songs that wrench your heart muscles and remind you of that first sweet kiss, but most of them are so disastrously and nauseatingly cheesy that they should be kept behind closed doors, whether in the home or a karaoke lounge. Watching a loving serenade in public is tolerable if it’s short and sweet, but more often than not I’m inclined to stand up, slap the man and tell him to buy her a damn diamond instead.
Tell Us: Do you find it romantic when someone serenades a love song to you, just like in the movies? What love song melts your heart, no matter how cheesy it is?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg. Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

83 : Gimme gimme more

Gimme Gimme More
February 12th, 2008 Posted in Raven Hanson

Raven Says: Okay, Valentine’s Day is on 14 Feb. So let’s talk about love. But can you give your partner too much love?

I mean, as women we all know about self-sacrifice and wanting to make our mate happy, but where do we draw the line? Is it when friends and family start asking about our relationship, with concerns that it’s ‘one sided’? Is it when you realise that they’ve made an effort to change but still stay out way too late when you’ve already made dinner? Or is it merely a bad joke while out at a nice restaurant together?Somehow, suddenly, we realize we’ve given them too much love; our eyes open to the fact that our niceties are taken for granted and our little gifts unwrapped with expectation instead of excitement. And then what? What recourse do we have in this negative stream of our own creation? I think that realisation is the first step: realising that you’re giving too much and being appreciated too little.

At the end of the day, we must acknowledge and remember that to spoil someone is exactly that- spoiling the person that we fell in love with by drowning them in affection; like a fruit left to soak in water over time.
Tell Us: Is it possible to love someone too much? When is it just enough or when does it become excessive? Has it happened to you before?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg. Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

84 : Slackjawed : for TNPpostwoman.com

Standing at the juice stall today, I noticed a man sitting in a car next to me. He was close enough to touch but didn't seem to be aware of me watching him as he sat, staring slack jawed and unblinking out of the windscreen. He almost looked dead, so relaxed and open was his jaw- his mouth was fully hanging open! I was openly staring but he didn't move an inch. I became concerned and started to wondered whether he'd had a stroke (yes, it was that bad) when suddenly he started to chatter into the mouthpiece that was hanging on his left, out of my sight.
I was relieved that he wasn't in fact, dead, or the victim of a terrible public stroke, but wondered why on earth he had his mouth hanging open like that? I've noticed it a lot actually, and always been sceptical about whether the person is doing it intentionally, is retarded, or is really that unaware of the fact that we're all staring at their tonsils. Is this normal? Does it strike anyone else by me as strange? I find it weird as hell, and have even tried doing it to try and understand the reason behind it. Is it super relaxing? Is it calming? Is it easy to do without thinking? Is it a totally natural facial movement? The answer to all of the above is NO. So WHY??

85 : God, and other friends

God, and other friends.
Life can be lonely. For most of us, at some point or another, we realize that despite our friends and family, we often do feel very alone. With the internet further isolating us from physical contact, it seems that our worlds are becoming duller, sadder and more lonely.
Friends have their own lives, family lives a short drive away; there’s usually someone we can call but there’s not always someone to turn to in that moment when we need them the most.
I realized that this is why many people turn to religion. With religion, anywhere you go and anything you do, you’ve got a friend by your side, in your head and always looking out for your best interests. All you need do is ask.

You’re taught to take life as it comes, appreciate more, give thanks for what you’ve got and try to find lessons in the bad. Essentially you give yourself a kick in the pants and tell yourself to enjoy life, because your new deity friend is along for the ride and refuses to let you waste this precious time. You’ve got someone to answer to, and you desperately want their approval. You’ve finally decided to enjoy life, because you’ve got someone to appreciate it with, who encourages you to cherish yourself, others, and make the best of what you’ve got. I’m not religious, but it’s as good an argument as I’m going to get for it, and I think that anyone who finds joy, in whatever way or form they find it, is on the right path as long as they keep following what makes them happy.

86 : Parent Trap : for TNPpostwoman.com

Parent trap
I have a friend who never answers calls from her mother. She says that she’s scared to. I have another friend who only ever fights with his father when they meet. He says it’s the only thing they know how to do together.

Now my mother is coming to town and we’ve never spent much quality time together. My fairytale childhood was spent surrounded by friends, classmates and cousins while on trips to the park, parties and Disneyland.

My mother was always silently in the background, the engine under the hood, making all these amazing experiences appear out of thin air. I took, she gave and I never spent much time talking with her about it. I never asked her why she did it or whether she liked it. We never talked about anything really.

So I’ve finally woken up. I realize how much of my amazing life was orchestrated entirely by her hand and am determined to find out more about this remarkable person; the good, the bad, the wonderful. I don’t know if it will be easy, and I don’t expect it to be, but I wonder how many of us have to make the effort to find out about the people we call parents? Is it natural to be distant from your parents, or is it natural to be close? And why will some of us never accept or forgive our parents for how they are?